Fueled with this new resolve, Esther embarked on her career as guardian angel for the Happy Trails Trailer Home Community and all of its denizens. She decided early on that in order to be truly helpful to the living, she needed to begin interacting with their world. Previously, Esther had delighted in being able to walk through walls and furniture without disturbing so much as a dust mote, but that skill wouldn’t be helpful in the event that she had to snatch a child out of harm’s way. Esther learned that by concentrating really hard, she could make herself solid enough to touch and move physical objects. And if she REALLY put her mind to it, she could move things without necessarily touching them at all. Unfortunately, she learned this while standing in front of her best friend Lanie Reynolds’ priceless collection of NASCAR driver plates—all made of the finest quality porcelain from the Franklin Mint. Esther managed to pulverize Mark Martin and Jeff Gordon in one fell swoop.

Naturally, Esther tried to make amends by writing a little note to Lanie explaining what had happened, but she wasn’t really skilled at grasping a physical object for long periods, so the end result was somewhat strange to look at. Still, Esther thought, it was better than nothing. Just because a person was dead didn’t mean they could give up their manners. Satisfied, she headed over to her old home to check up on Eddie and to take a brief respite from averting catastrophes.

Esther was extremely surprised, therefore, when Lanie Reynolds came shrieking across the trailer park and barged right in on Eddie without knocking, Esther’s crumpled note clutched in one shaking hand. Lanie stopped in front of Eddie’s battered recliner, drew in a breath, and yelled at the sleeping figure before her, “Eddie! Eddie! I’m bein’ haunted! Haunted by Esther! She polterghostin’ me, just like in the movies!”

Eddie snorted and woke at this barrage, adjusting his boxer shorts so that he was presentable for company. He blinked slowly at Lanie and grunted, reaching for his can of beer. After a thoughtful sip, Eddie regained his verbal ability. “What?” he asked.

“IT”S ESTHER!” bellowed Lanie. “She’s haunting me! She broke two of my best plates and even left me a ghostly warning from BEYOND THE GRAVE!” Lanie drew out these last words in doom-filled tones. Esther, who had been observing this exchange with some amusement, prepared herself to write another explanatory note, but Lanie’s next words stopped her cold.
“I think she knows about us, Eddie, and she’s become a VENGEFUL SPIRIT.” Lanie’s eyes, already large and round in her small fat face, grew bigger still as she announced Esther’s evil plan to Eddie. Esther had frozen where she was sitting on the arm of Eddie’s chair, and was staring at Lanie. She looks, thought Esther bitterly, like a startled bullfrog.

Suddenly, being a guardian angel didn’t seem like such a hot idea to Esther. In fact, as she watched Eddie trying to calm Lanie down by telling her that: a) there were no such things as ghosts, and b) that Esther was too “self-centered and thick”—his very words—to have noticed an affair, Esther began to feel that maybe her calling in the afterlife was not guardian angel. Avenging angel, now that had a nice ring to it. Still, Esther told herself firmly, best not to fly off the handle. Maybe a breath of fresh air would help. Or a pretend breath, anyway: old habits were hard to break. So Esther left the armchair and wafted through the trailer wall toward the Happy Trails common area.